westerly memoir

The Westerly Memoir Project

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The Westerly Memoir Project (WMP) embarks on its second summer  July 11, 2017.  The project blends top-notch instruction in the art of memoir with the long-term goal of creating an anthology of personal essays, all set in the treasured seaside community of Westerly, RI.  Grub Street, a creative writing center in Boston, has completed two such projects.  The Boston Memoir Project spanned over a decade and culminated in the publication of 5 anthologies representing various neighborhoods within the city.  Then there was the Nantucket Memoir Project, which more closely mirrors the scope of the WMP.

With the pull of the ocean, both summer residents and a vibrant year-round community share a special setting.  As such, there are a myriad of view points and diverse experiences that will make up the finished work of essays to be published as the Westerly Memoir Project.

I initiated this project last year with the help of the Westerly Public Library, the Watch Hill Memorial Library and Improvement Society, and Grub Street because I truly love this place.  My co-chair, Katie Porter, and I are excited to bring the best instructing Boston’s Grub Street has to offer to our summer home.  We are also excited about where this project might lead.  The hope is that this project ignites writing well beyond that first personal narrative.  Last summer’s sessions felt like the nascent beginnings of  Westerly’s own writing community.  Let’s keep it going ! Imagine where we can go from here.

meme-eden

Goodreads Giveaway!

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Between March 21 and April 21, 2017 click Goodreads Giveaway! to enter.  There are ten chances to win a copy of Eden: A Novel.

 

Dedications

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February 13 is Dedications day for #Authorlifemonth on Instagram.

Ventures take on greater meaning when dedicated to others, such as cooking a nurturing meal for loved ones, setting an intention before a yoga practice, or when my son, Charlie, and I ran the Boston Marathon for Stepping Strong trauma research last April. Similarly, as Eden started to take shape, I found added motivation in the lives of women I love. My characters, Sadie, Becca, Rachel and Sarah, were inspired by women who carried their pasts heavily, rarely or hesitatingly speaking of their experiences, women who were silenced, quieted, told to move on. Sometimes I felt myself writing with the urgency of unburdening them as well as challenging the world to listen.

The dedication of Eden was in no way an afterthought. The voices of Anne, Mary, Betty and Jeanne were with me from the very beginning.

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Writing The Willows: America’s Cradle

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It only makes sense that during the baby boom years after WWII, there would also have been a sharp rise in the number of illegitimate pregnancies. You’ve seen pictures of those soldiers coming home, there was kissing in the streets and presumably a lot more going on! But in the 1940’s, the options for women who were unmarried and pregnant were very limited. Many women and girls were sent away under the ruse that they were needed to care for a sick relative or to go away to school. They would have their children in some distant place and then come home as if nothing had happened.

A primary source of my inspiration for writing Eden came from a conversation I had with a woman who was born in the 1950’s and adopted from a maternity hospital in Kansas City. She enlightened me: Kansas City was the place many of these unwed, American girls went. So much so that it became known as the “baby hub” of the United States, being centrally located and easily accessible by railroad.

My follow up research uncovered facts that really got the writer in me thinking. Thousands and thousands of babies were born in no fewer than a dozen maternity homes that were established in Kansas City. Missouri had progressive adoption laws and the babies were legally placed through the court system. There was great care taken in matching children and families. For example, the appearance of birth parents and adoptive parents was often matched as was religion. There were three institutions that stood out in Kansas City: St Anthony’s, Kansas City Cradle, and The Willows.

The Willows is indeed where I envisioned Becca (Eden’s main character) going in 1945 to have her baby. Of course, just a teenager herself, her mother did the research and made all of the arrangements. Becca traveled to the Willows by rail just as its actual residents did. The real Willows Sanitarium closed for good in 1969 and the story is that the boxes and boxes of files that had been stored in the basement were taken to the backyard and burned, so it may have been impossible for my fictional Lee to really have found Becca fifty years later.

The Willows accommodated approximately 25-30 residents at a time and was known as the “Ritz” or “Waldorf” of maternity hospitals, serving an upper class clientele. It has been estimated that 35,000 babies were provided for adoption by the Willows in its 65-year existence.

The following is a link to an excellent website (from which I sourced data for this blog post) It has original pictures of the Willows and gives more detail about its history:

http://immigrantships.net/adoption/thewillows.html

music-to-eden

A Musical Setting for Eden

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My son created this playlist on Spotify to get you in the mood.  Enjoy!!

home for the holidays

Home for the Holidays: Parenting in the College Years

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My last two blog posts covered far-reaching trips I’ve recently taken to Africa and South America.  When people asked me what our plans were for this holiday season,  I think they were expecting a more exotic reply, but I was happy to answer, “A good ‘ol family staycation…”  The two kids that are still in college requested that we don’t go anywhere this year, and John and I were more than happy to oblige.

The lack of plans allowed them to spend time with high school friends as well as for us to visit with other families in Boston.  Yes there are dentist appointments in the mix,….  but here are some highlights of our staycation:

·      Home cookin’…..  after months at college, the kiddoes are craving family classics

·      Lighting our menorah – first time in a long time kids are home for all nights of Hanukah

·      Shabbat dinners – Jack, our son in the workforce and Emily, his girlfriend, will be able to join us on 12/30!

·      Fires in the fireplace

·      Chinese Food (when we’re not home cookin’)

·      Family squash /yoga / soul cycle

·      Going to the movies – “Lalaland” was great, next up “Office Christmas Party” and “Star Wars”

·      Playing hearts at the kitchen table

·      Rocking to The Roots at the House of Blues

·      Going to the TD Garden to watch the Celtics and the Bruins

Best of all, time for reading – I’m reading Heat & Light by Jennifer Haigh – which I am loving.  Jennifer will be joining our book group for a special dinner party in early January !!

…AND writing!  I set a goal of finishing a manuscript by the end of 2016 and I’ll be damned, with some late nights, I am going to make it!  So after you wet your appetite with EDEN, you shouldn’t have to wait too long….

If you are enjoying your own staycation this week, I would love to hear your highlights…

Melody Beatty’s daily meditation in Journey to the Heart for December 26 gets to the core of it:

 

We search for sacred spaces, spiritual

experiences, and truths.  But the holiest

places are often found when we spend

time with people we love.

May your home be the sanctuary you crave.

Love and Peace in 2017

possibilities

Patagonia: Stay Open to the Possibilities

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On a recent vacation to Patagonia, I took a day off from hiking with the friends I’d traveled with to go horseback riding. Who could resist the beauty of the animals, the gaucho culture, or the wide open, expansive landscape?  I’m not an experienced rider, but talked my way into a group that included a marvelous horsewoman from Seattle and a charming Brazilian couple.

This experience was a reminder that you never know when you are going to meet somebody who inspires you, and that role models are everywhere if you just stay open to new possibilities. Carol is in her late fifties and  traveled down to Chile in order to help her son (ex- Facebook) and his wife and their new baby move there.  After settling them in, she started traveling alone – first spending 7 days camping and hiking “The W” in Torres el Paine. Then she came to the lodge where I met her where she’d been on riding excursions for 6 days.  She told me stories of her and a friend riding her three horses 500 miles through the Cascades and into Canada. She told me about her future travel plans in Chile and Argentina.

She also talked about her other grandchildren back in Washington who she’d taught to ride and built tree houses for. After a morning of her wild stories and infectious laughter, I commented “You must have the coolest kids.” A big grin spread across her face and she said, “Well, my grandkids tell me I’m the coolest grandma ever.”

When the gauchos gave the signal, we’d go from a walk to a trot and then to a gallop. I stayed behind Carol and tried to do what she did. Her only words of advice as the horses picked up speed were, “Just don’t fall!!”  It was exhilarating, thrilling, and downright frightening. I loved every minute of that day.  I was grateful to meet Carol, whose sense of adventure and wanderlust inspired me, not to mention her moniker of “coolest grandma ever”.

I love meeting strong, independent women, especially strong women who travel to far off places alone.  Carol is the type of woman who says, “YES!” to life.  I’m smiling right now just thinking about her.  Sadie, a character in my novel, Eden, was an accomplished horsewoman as well.  Maybe if she lived in 2016, she would have been more like Carol….  instead of… well I don’t want to spoil it for you.

As Eden approaches its publication date and gallies are now in hand…  Jeannie is exhilarated, thrilled, and also a little bit frightened…  but she’s holding on tight!

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Rhode Island Research: The Great Hurricane

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Over the course of writing my book, which took many, many years, it would always be sort of cool and sort of weird when the events in the story came into confluence with reality.  For example, working on the Fourth of July scene when it actually was the Fourth of July, or writing about Becca’s journey to the Willows when I myself was traveling by train.  Fiction and reality could get mixed up in a crazy and fun way inside my head and the writing and editing process would take on a special clarity, a certain obviousness (of, course this is the way it happened!)

I write this blog post, having just experienced a spectacular weekend under the glow of the full harvest moon.  On Saturday night we watched the yellow/orange orb rise slowly in the sky.  For the past three days, the high tides have been extremely high and the low tides have been extremely low.  The yellow jackets buzzed around the garden frantically knowing their time was almost up. This morning, the rains came.  The wind might not be blowing, but it is coming down hard and the skies are grey.  I can’t help thinking about Bunny and Becca (characters in my book you will just have to wait for!!), on that afternoon, seventy-eight years ago, this week, when the great Hurricane of 1938 took them by surprise.  The full moon, high tides, and high winds all converged to create tidal waves that destroyed whole towns across the northeast, hitting southern Rhode Island possibly the worst.

Last night as my husband flipped through the channels, waiting for the Red Sox to come on, he accidentally came across a special on Rhode Island PBS about survivors of the hurricane.  It included surprisingly vivid film footage of the storm as well as the destruction in its aftermath.  I was transfixed by how frightening it must have been.  The loss from the storm was tragic, but what I couldn’t help thinking as I watched the black and white film of  waves, bending trees, and homes disappearing into the surf was how scary. How scary to experience what have must felt like the end of the world in 1938 without help on its way and without immediate communication with the outside world. The hurricane scene in my book could have been even more frightening and still would never have been an exaggeration.

And then as if I needed another poke from the universe, when turning to Melody Beattie’s Journey to the Heart this morning I read:

September 19 – Weather the Storm…. Just as nature plays out her storms, sometimes with violence, sometimes with gray days, sometimes with a gentle cleansing rain, we have storms in our lives, storms in our soul.  Storms are a part of life, part of growth, part of the journey….

Does Melody know what hurricane season is like on the east coast? If not, she certainly knows about scary.  Storms are part of the journey and so is overcoming them.  The most important thing to remember is that storms don’t last forever; they come into our lives and eventually leave.  They are usually tumultuous, but relatively short, and the human spirit has, time and again,  just as it did in the months and years after the ’38 Hurricane,  found the fortitude to rebuild.

 

 

 

daughter-in-law-hood

Daughter-in-law-hood

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Have you read the Book of Ruth? Ruth is the ultimate daughter-in-law in the Jewish Bible. Even after her husband dies, Ruth remains with her mother-in-law, Naomi, refusing the request that she return to her own people. Ruth adopts Naomi’s religion and travels with her to the land of Judah. Ruth and Naomi have a special bond of friendship. Ruth is depicted as the first convert to Judaism in the bible and interestingly, it is from her line that David, the great king is descended.

A convert to Judaism myself, I feel a connection to Ruth. Not only is she the first convert, but a revered and important figure in the history of the Jewish people. To me, the story of Ruth is a testament to Jews always welcoming converts and was partly responsible for me publicly owning my new religion.

Besides being a convert, Ruth is a true friend and source of support for Naomi, her mother-in-law. In Eden, Ruth is the consummate daughter in law to Sadie. She stays by Sadie’s side even after Robert dies, and coincidentally it is her son that is the family’s financial savior, purchasing the home, and keeping it in the family.

Being a daughter-in-law to people who have no daughters of their own, I also feel that connection to Ruth. In my case, it was not my mother-in-law who leaned in me for support, it’s been my father-in-law. I am his surrogate daughter. Even in this modern age, when my husband is willing to pitch in on an equal basis, there are things his father just feels more comfortable coming to me for. Is it because I am a woman? Because I am more comfortable talking about emotions and relationships? Because we share the vocation of writing? Because he just assumes I’m more available to help with domestic and medical matters? We have a friendship and share points of view that are not shared by my husband.

Being a daughter or son-in-law, is often a delicate dance. I certainly stumbled and mis-stepped in the beginning, but figuring it out, and disproving the caricature of in-law as “out-law” has resulted in one of my most satisfying relationships.

inheritance

Inheritance

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What gets passed down in a family is an important theme in Eden.  What do we inherit? Money, possessions? Possibly, but usually not without angst.  Behaviors and opinions are also passed down, for better or worse. The obvious things like physical traits are easy for the outside world to see.  What is not apparent are our feelings about ourselves, what we like about ourselves and dislike about ourselves. We inherit recipes and histories, oral and written. We inherit a way of doing things, a set of expectations, approval and disapproval. We inherit love, we inherit disappointment. The estate planning and the last will and testament is the least of it!

As we mature and find ourselves wedged in the middle between aging parents and children coming into adulthood, it is a logical time to think about some of these things.  As our closets and basements and attics become depositories for family heirlooms, it is a time to think about how the intangible heirlooms will also get divided up.

Is inheritance a privilege or a responsibility?  Is the younger generation beholden to its elders? Some will walk away from everything, while others will accept their inheritance with gratitude and refashion what they receive to work in their lives.